My Monday post was a terribly un-funny look at the raw guts of humor.
Now for the funny part….
In preparing to draft my humorous skits, I read some D*mnYouAutocorrect (warning: NOT PG) and paid homage to LOLcats. After I wiped the tears of laughter from my face, I got to work.
My first discovery was that I absolutely cannot write in screenplay format. Tried. Total kill to my creativity. So I wrote in narrative and then translated to screenplay format after all was done.
My second discovery was that I had to not over-think the comedy. I needed to just get in-character and go with it. I’m way too novice to do anything but intuit the funny.
Rough drafts are always … rough. This was no exception. But when you’re rough in comedy writing, well, you’re just not funny. Or funny enough. Once the first draft was done, I put my intentional writer hat on and looked at how to amp up the funny-factor in my situations (since I’m really writing sit-com), rather than amping up the tension (as I would in a drama). And there was still a story to navigate – it had to have a beginning, middle, and end, even if it was told in 1 minute skits across an hour by 6th grade actors in front of a microphone. Yeah, no problem!
I looked for gaps between expectation and reality and made them wider. I looked for character contradictions and made them stronger. I gave characters mannerisms that would gather a chuckle and obey the rule that the funniest characters have a “humour” to which they are completely blind – an obsessive drive that they cannot perceive, but everyone else can. Which makes us laugh at them.
In the end, I just printed out the pages and handed them to Dark Omen, resident 6th grader and humor expert. He took it off into another room and read the script to his younger brothers.
There were giggles. I was happy.
Dark Omen, Mighty Mite, and I acted out the entire play for an audience of one (Worm Burner), and it got a few more chuckles. We timed it, to make sure we were within the 1-2 min time frame allowed for these snippets between the real acts of the variety show. We’ll still have to trial run it past my fellow skit coordinator and her son, not to mention the Variety Show Committee for their approval.
But humor no longer terrifies me, and I have a good handle on screenplay formatting now.
Sometimes I think almost all writing is a leap of faith into the unknown. I’m just glad when I don’t land in a pile of sharks.
p.s. Because you asked for it, here’s a snippet from the script.
SET-UP: The Love Boat theme was determined by the Variety Show Committee, so I had to work from there. The story involves three arcs (crew, pirates, and stowaways) and their adventures in between the Golden Nugget variety acts on board the ship. This is the second skit, where the pirates are introduced…(formatting is different, because Blogger hates screenplays)
to get rich, sneaks onto the stage with PIRATE2, who just wants snacks and a
cool pirate name. PIRATE1 is carrying a pirate hook in one hand, and PIRATE2
has a pirate bandana on.)
sneaking pose)
Hook?
name!
find out where they’re keeping the Golden Nuggets!
think they’ll have dipping sauce?
rich!
smoothie? I like smoothies, especially strawberry smoothies. Big chunks of
strawberries.
nuggets are hidden.
That's wonderful. The play on words, the contrasting character with one being serious the other not, the mix of pirates with modern day food. All humorous. Great job!
@Laura Thanks! Although I think the school's getting what they pay for, in hiring an amateur playwrite! 🙂
I loved this, Susan! Well, I'm a sucker for pirates, but ones that make laugh are the best.
Congrats on mastering the screenplay format. Great job.
@C.Lee I'm much more Padawan than master, but thank you for your kind words. The proof will be in drawing laughs from the K-6 crowd! 🙂
Oh I love it!!! Good work and I can't imagine how hard the screenplay format must be to get used to. Wow!
We must all, forthwith, have smoothies.
And I think it can actually help to look at how funny sentences are created, too. They have their own structures. Full of reverses and expectations that are created and then punctured. The incongruity! The humour!
I was reading Tawna Fenske's blog the other day and admiring how sharp she is with funny lines. But I think it can actually be helpful to look at those sentences and figure out the logic of them. Not that the logic is funny, but once you know that, then you can make substitutions and create your own versions.
This is my theory, anyhow. Not a very funny theoy, I admit.
Though that typo is sort of funny.
@Lindsay Screenplay is SO different – there is so much that is left to the actor (and it must be this way), but it's hard for someone who is used to eliciting emotion via her words. 🙂
@Bryan You have a great subtle wit that I've always admired (typos not withstanding). I'll have to check out Ms. Fenske's blog and see what I can glean. I feel like I'm still in the toddler-with-blocks stage of humor writing. 🙂
That's cute and clever. I bet the kids love it.
Very brave of you to dive in and do it, too.
I was scared of humor, until I read aloud several times to crit group and they laughed–repeatedly, where they should. Such a relief.
Total love! My 3rd grader would think this is hi-lar-i-ous!! 🙂
@Tricia I know what you mean about that relief, when you hear the audience "getting" your work. One of the best things I've found about having a face-to-face crit group (once you get past the terror of THAT). 🙂
@Shannon Thanks! 3rd grader=target audience=WIN! 🙂
This is awesome! 🙂 And good job for diving into it headfirst. Loved the dipping sauce joke.
@SideKick Hi! 🙂 I am nothing if not willing to jump in headlong. Thanks for stopping by! 🙂
Good work! Thanks for sharing.
hi miss susan! yikes! you did sooo much research stuff to get that done for your kids. thats love for sure. for me just reading the skit didnt do it so i said it out loud and could see it in my head and for sure that got me laughing. and the dipping sauce made that line lots more funny. ha ha. i could like to see that skit for real.
…laughs and hugs from lenny
You did great! I would love to be able to write good humor, kids do love it. I posted about writing humor today, seems like a lot of bloggers did.
@Becky Thanks for stopping by!
@Lenny You are so right, it's all in the delivery. Some jokes read funny, but it's definitely different on paper than out loud. Thanks for trying it! 😉
@Janet Thanks! I'll have to hop over and check out your post! 🙂
My favorite quote of the day (via Janet): "Abandon your dignity: You can't be funny if you're afraid of embarrassing yourself."
I've heard some writers recommend that you write your novel in script form first, then edit it into novel format. No thanks.
Great job on writing humor. I just can't do it for a younger audience. Sharky/witty YA for me. 😉
Thank you, thank you for choosing the excerpt with pirates in it.
@Stina Write in script, THEN convert to narrative? Ack! And I think you meant snarky, but I kinda like sharky better! 🙂 *chomp, chomp*
@Adam *smiles* Or I could have posted the scene with the stowaways dressed as Ninjas. I had way too much fun with this little piece.
This is great! My kids would have been giggling, too 🙂
@Sherrie *smiles* Thanks!
I don't think I could attempt a screenplay, although I am interested in the process. Bravo for doing it!!
You are not only very brave, but clever and funny! You certainly show that you do know your audience!
Thanks for sharing this 🙂 🙂
@Catherine Thanks! I'm glad I did it, just for the learning experience.
@JB Thank you! I just hope the kids agree… 🙂