I change goals all the time – but that’s because I’ve rethought what my purpose is and then re-align my goals to follow that compass heading. As we near the end of the year, it’s natural to look back, see where we’ve been, then look forward and set a new direction.
I’m in the middle of a seven-week goal plan that will take me to the first of the year… so now’s not the time to look for new direction (staying the course is as important as making sure you’re on target). I’ve had a series of these 7-8week plans over the last year, and I’ve found that method works very well for me – partly because my goals aren’t just a rabbit for me to chase after, work harder, run faster for. They’re changing the fundamentals of how I am in the world – core habits.
Most of what we do during the day is habitual – brushing our teeth, reading, driving, nervous habits, emotional responses – things we learned long ago and our brain has, for efficiency, buried in our subconscious as auto-routines.
BAD NEWS: Dredging those habits up out of the subconscious in order to change them is substantial work. Not only that, but you can think you’re changing a habit (usually through force of willpower alone) only to lapse back into old behaviors once the going gets tough.
GOOD NEWS: Once you *really* change a habitual behavior, your brain drops it back into the subconscious, and it becomes a *new* habit (or really an *altered* habit because you can’t really break bad habits – you can only substitute in a good one. That’s because habits are formed in response to some need in your life that continues.)
Most people think of changing habits as “forcing” themselves to have the willpower (to eat better or exercise more or whatever) – but it’s really not willpower at all. It’s paying attention to the right things. Which, I suppose, is a form of willpower (really it’s FOCUS, but that’s a different topic) – but all the steely-eyed will in the world will not change a habit if you don’t understand its underlying triggers, how the dopamine in your brain reinforces the habit, and how to substitute new (better) behavior responses.
I highly recommend reading the Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg *before* you make your grand New Year’s plans… I had to read this book three times before I really *got* what it was saying and how to apply it. For a quick overview, see the video below.
I’m glad you brought up The Power of Habit. I read it a couple of years ago, but I think it’s time to read it again.
Susan, I loved reading this. I just began meditating on a daily basis about a month ago (I was inspired by Joe Dispenza’s book, “You are the Placebo.” And, like you, I’m working on rewiring my brain, because that is where true change begins. Best of luck reaching your goals and thank you for the inspiration!